I'll love you for a thousand more."
Love,
Jesus Christ
This song was made to be taken from the perspective of a boy trying to adequately express his love to the girl he has fallen for (At least, this is the message i see fits best the song anytime I have listened to it). Now, I agreed with the assumed meaning of this song until today...
Something changed when this song played over my laptop speakers this afternoon. I had just read through my two devotionals when I really started focusing on the lyrics of this song. In the first verse, she sings about questioning the ability to love because fear is getting in the way. When i looked up the lyrics I realized how much the first verse echoed a cry my own heart has shouted before: There lies in my heart a fear to love no matter how badly I want too. We are not perfect...If you haven't recently noticed. We are flawed, broken, and specific to this example we are scarred. In my past relationships I have faced my fair share of rejection, whether it be from a friendship, a boyfriend, but especially from my biological father. To sum up a long story, my father was not exactly the best example of how to love.
If you are a dad and you are reading this, or a man that hopes to be a father someday, please read and understand these next few lines carefully. Little girls grow up. Little girls eventually get boyfriends. Little girls someday might get married. LITTLE GIRLS NEED YOU TO BE THE EXAMPLE OF HOW TO LOVE AND HOW THEY SHOULD BE LOVED BY A MAN. My father was never around, and whenever he was I was striving to do anything I could to get his attention; to get his lips to simply purse a smile just because of him being proud of something I did. My father's lack of attention paid to me, and his absence of loving remarks shows in my life today through the scars I bear with me everywhere I go. To this day I have a deeply rooted fear of losing those I genuinely care about. This effects the way that I am able to love people. My ability to be myself is paired up against the fear of the people I am closest to not accepting the real me. Quite the contradiction. (Boys, don't tune out on this next part, even though it is focused towards the opposite gender, you may learn something about us that you could find useful to know) And for those of you girls reading this, you know that little thing called self-consciousness? It doesn't just show up because you finished that entire quarter pounder from McDonalds and now you have a food baby. It does not exist simply because you are wearing a form fitting dress compared to your usual t-shirt and jeans combo. Self-conciousness arises because that moment when it decides to rear it's ugly head, is tied to an emotion. An emotion stored in the recesses of your mind from a time that you too were "injured." Now that wound has stuck, and getting rid of it can seem like the toughest thing in the world to do, maybe even an impossible feat.
But, there is Hope.
First, know that you ARE NOT the only person going through this. Every single girl in the universe has felt the same thing you are going through in your most insecure moments. You are not alone in this.
Secondly, that wound that you carry, whether it be from a past boyfriend or an uninvolved father, is overlooked by a certain someone out there. There is someone who has loved you for a thousand years regardless of your aching heart, and fearful thoughts. His name is Jesus Christ.
No matter how many boys break your heart, no matter how many times your earthly father fails you(which HE WILL, HE'S NOT PERFECT), Jesus always sees you as the His beautiful, breathtaking creation that He will forever gaze upon. He can't help but smile every single time He looks at, or even thinks about you. He died for YOU. He is the perfect suitor, pursuer, and lover, who guess what? DESIRES YOUR LOVE BACK!
Wait what?
He is like the man of every girls dreams, you have got to be thinking, "How could he possibly even notice me?" Well, not only has he noticed you, but HE DIED FOR YOU, HE SACRIFICED HIS ONLY SON FOR YOU, HE GAVE UP HIS MOST PRECIOUS POSSESSION JUST SO HE COULD HAVE YOU AND CALL YOU HIS.
Now that is what I call true love.
We can gaze upon Him and our doubts suddenly vanish.
Even with our faults and our inability to provide total selfless love, His perfect Love casts out our fears.
This song is resonating the message found in 1 John 4:18 which says, "There is no fear in love, but PERFECT LOVE CASTS OUT FEAR..."This song is God shouting out to His people, "I have loved you since before the creation of the world, and I will continue loving you just as much as I did when I first saw you, and for all of eternity! Run to me, my love for you will cast out your fears to love me back. I know you are bruised and this world has hurt you, but I STILL WANT YOU." God is a jealous God in the sense that He will not let anything ever come between us and our relationship with Him.
The bridge of this song repeats the words "One step closer."
Every time we allow for God's perfect love to be displayed through our lives, we come one step closer, not only in relationship with Him, but also in our relationships with those around us. I have an incredible man in my life that God has blessed me with. Every time we have both been in the Word, in prayer, and seeking to strengthen our relationship with Christ, I can honestly see God pulling my boyfriend and I closer together. I can not find the words to even describe what an incredible man God has given me, and I sincerely hope that God allows for OUR story together to last a thousand years.
So what are you waiting for?
I understand that it is scary to trust in something you can't see, something you may not even recognize is there half of the time. But believe me when I say this...
This incredible God has loved you longer, more passionately, fought for you more than any earthly being ever could. He loves you with every fiber of His soverign being, and all He wants is
YOU.
So, will you take the invitation into the most incredible love story ever created? It's your choice, and God will wait as long as it takes until He gets you back into His loving arms, right where you belong.
